Libby,
I don't know if it is the issue of the other girls being here and you don't feel you are getting enough attention or if you have just turned into a giant turd for no reason, but I thought you might want to know the following things are going to happen:
1. If you screech like a banshee, so loud that I drop whatever I am doing and rush in to stop the bleeding and find that someone had the audacity to touch something of yours, you will be wishing I had found blood.
2. If you don't listen the first six times Daddy tells you to do something and he goes bat shit crazy on your ass, I will no longer interfere, in fact I might go a little nuts myself.
3. If you continue to break the rule about food in your room, I am going to refuse to wash your sheets and you will be sleeping with your crackers, chips, popcorn, candy, grapes and cheese whiz for quite some time.
4. If you continue to go in my room and snoop through my drawers and cupboards, I wouldn't be at all surprised when the next time you feel around to find my hidden gum or money you instead find a mouse trap or something similarly exciting.
5. If Every. Single. Time. you open your mouth and all I am hearing is a whiny, crybaby voice come out, I will no longer be able to hear anything you say. No whining louder will not help me hear you any better.
6. If you tell me one more time that you don't like what we are having for dinner, even though you have eaten it at least 200 times, and refuse to eat, you will be going to bed hungry.
7. If you don't quit bothering the dogs and trying to cart Sissy around like a baby doll, even though you have been told multiple times daily for the last 3 weeks not to, I am not going to stop them from biting you when you piss them off. So you better learn to run a little faster than they can.
8. If I hear your voice saying something and then you say "It was Anaya" one more time you are going to sit on time out for the rest of my life.
9. If you cannot control yourself and quit teasing the other girls until someone is crying, I may be forced to give you a taste of your own medicine and tease you until you cry. And, I might like it!
I am done! I have tried giving you extra one on one time and tried to get you to tell me what is wrong, but I have pretty much decided that you come by being a turd genetically and I am going to have to pull out the big guns! Yep, you got it, the big turd is going to take you on! Get ready!!
I'm Gonna Kill Santa Claus
3 years ago
3 comments:
LMAO,... that is one scary letter. Ok, I will 'steal' some of it, and file it under 'one day when I have to parent little someones',...
Thank you for the visit to my blog
I Love Trina i could not quit laughing senice i have seen what you go though all the time. I Love the letter
LOL So funny. Hope you all have a great time with Max's girls.
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